Friday, March 31, 2006
I haven't seen her since 11 am this morning. I am sick to my stomach. I can't believe she's gone.
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
If this law passes, what will happen?" said Yadira Pech, 16. "There would be no more Los Angeles High School. Nearly all of us are immigrants."
I suppose Ms. Pech doesn't study up much on current events because if she did she would know that this legislation is focusing on ILLEGAL immigrants. And if she is illegal, if her parents are illegal, then they should be returned to their home country.
Antonio Chavez, an eighth-grader at University Heights Middle School in Riverside: "Our parents, our families came here from Mexico. We want other families to be able to come here too."
And so they should be allowed to break our laws to get here? Another one who doesn't know much about the laws of the country he calls his home.
Oh wait it gets better. The LA Times reported "some students said they did not know exactly what the bill said but believed that it was part of an anti-immigrant movement taking hold nationwide."
I could have told you that. It's all knee-jerk reaction. None of them has actually read the legislation yet. Surprise.
I think what pisses me off the most was the "Viva Mexico!" and waving of flags from Mexico, El Salvador and many other nations. These people claim they want to come to America to make a future for themselves but the problem is they don't want to be American. Many don't want to learn the language, learn the culture, assimilate into society. They want to live in America but still be a citizen of their home country. Instead the rest of us are forced to adapt to them. My God I wish my ancestors had it that easy! I am tired of adapting, I want them to adapt to us. I am tired of my country being forcibly taken from me. I am sick of oppressed people saying Americans owe them something.
No, we don't owe you anything. If I want to give to you and help you I will do it because I want to not because you tell me that I have to just because I have more than you.
Don't think I don't feel for poor people in third world countries, because I do, but the answer to their problems is not opening the floodgates to America. The answer is helping them make their own countries better and it starts with forcing their leaders to make the first move, which won't happen. We are all responsible for our own lives. Do you want your country free and democratic? Well then do what my forefathers did and sacrifice your lives to do it. People will suffer, times will be tough, people will die. But the reward is greatr. In the end your country will be free and you can live the kind of life you want. How the hell do we think America became free? Men fought and died for it, hell they are still fighting and dying for it. Every day in America, there is always a fight to keep freedom and liberty, and it's usually the citizens keeping their government in check. Every day we fight to keep the kind of country our forefathers built for us. And now it's time for citizens of third world countries to do the same too. If the Mexican government is screwing over its citizens it's time to get rid of Vicente and form a new government. The people need to take charge. They can't continue to come over to America forever, someday they will need to revolt and take their country back.
But alas, I suppose it's just easier to cross the border and come here. And shame on the government officials here who have let this problem fester and did NOTHING!
I don't have an answer for the problem of the eleven million illegals currently living here. That is the fault of every past administration who allowed this to happen. I am not in favor of amnesty, it sends the message that the law means nothing and in America the law keeps us civilized, it's important to adhere to it.
America was built upon adherence to the law, and we must protect that at all costs.
I have heard, read, and been told that someday I will be a minority in America and then I, "Whitey" will know how it feels to be oppressed and treated with maliciousness and discrimination.
Is wanting to protect my culture, my heritage, my history and my country such a terrible thing that someone would get some kind of freakish joy trying to take it from me?
Monday, March 27, 2006
You're super dad, keep up the good work and keep on taking good care of yourself so you can be around to keep us in line for many many years to come.
It's about our borders.
My language, my customs, my heritage, my way of life is being threatened. And I am ready to do something about it.
The time has come where the US begins shutting down our borders. We have eleven million illegals in this country already and we are about to get more if we do not enforce the law and quickly. It is not right that the US is expected to have an open-ended immigration policy allowing anyone and everyone in at any time and for any reason.
Partha Banerjee, director of the New Jersey Immigration Policy Network, claimed that this is some sort of "civil rights movement reborn in this country."
Angela Sanbrano, executive director of the Central American Resource Center of Los Angeles claims that at a message needs to be sent to Congress and the President that "the immigrant community will not allow the criminalization of our people — and it needed to be very strong because of the anti-immigrant environment that we are experiencing in Congress."
The Reverend Samuel Rodriguez Jr., president of the National Hispanic Association of Evangelicals, has warned us that Congress wuld pay for going against the hispanic community.
He stated: "I know there are pure hearts that want to protect our border and protect our country, but at the same time the Hispanic community cannot deny the fact that many have taken advantage of an important and legitimate issue in order to manifest their racist and discriminatory spirit against the Hispanic community."
Fabricio Fierros, an eighteen year old American citizen born to illegal immigrants said
"It's not fair to workers here to just kick them out without giving them a legal way to be here," Mr. Fierros said, "To be treated as criminals after all the work they did isn't fair."
Fair? They came here illegally and broke the law doing so. We the people did not vote to allow it, nor did our Congress pass any law allowing people to migrate here illegally. They are criminals, they broke the law and they should be sent home.
America isn't anti-immigrant, it is anti-illegal immigrant and yes, there's a difference. We have a right to protect our security, our health, our education system, our heritage, our language and our customs. The reason so many people are up in arms is because America's future is being threatened. No country can survive such an influx of illegal immigrants. They are coming over with diseases, taxing our hospitals, health care system, and our schools. America has laws in place to enforce who comes to this country, when and for how long and as a sovereign nation we have a right to expect those laws followed. And when they are not, we have the right to prosecute offenders.
And as far as comments like "we cook your meals, clean your hotel rooms, landscape your golf courses" all I can say is that somehow those things would get done or those businesses would have to fold. And maybe that has to happen to make American businesses realize they need to hire legal employees. If my hotel can't find people to clean the rooms, I won't stay there, if my husband's golf course can't keep nice greens, he won't golf there. And eventually SOMEONE would do these jobs. There are a lot of people in this country who need jobs and I am sure we could find someone to fill them.
I blame our President and his administration for letting this issue fester for so long that it is about to go out of control. Bush and Congress had six years to come up with a viable policy, they have done nothing. Clinton and his administration had eight years. Nobody in Congress has done a damn thing to solve this problem. It took regular law abiding citizens like the Minutemen to devise a plan for protecting our borders.
At this point in time what I worry about is my own culture being threatened. My language, my heritage, my country is being threatened. What kind of country allows a person to be fired from their job because they don't speak a foreigh language? Do you think, in Mexico, an employee of a government agency is let go because they don't speak English? Do you think in Mexico, when you dial a private or state run organization you have to press "2" for "English"? Do you think that in Mexico, a US citizen could march in the streets shouting "Viva America" and wave an American flag?
No. Because we are America, we are expected to just open our borders and let everyone in. The problem is we can't handle it, we just can't. And in the meantime we're not doing a damn thing to force third-world leaders to improve conditions in their own countries in an effort to keep their people there. These leaders don't want these people, don't want their problems and so it's easier to make them our problem.
If Bush's buddy Vicente Fox, was a real man he would be working hard to keep his people home by making the country better and improving living and working conditions. As it stands, he won't do that and so the people come here, like they do from all of the other oppressed countries on this earth. The only people who migrate here illegally are people whose own governments refuse to do any good for their own countries.
I'd say it's time for economic sanctions against Mexico and all of these countries who encourage their people to sneak over our borders. Ultimately I believe our only solution to this problem is completely shutting down our borders. We are in an emergency situation and it's time for action now.
Don't ask me about the eleven million ILLEGAL aliens who are here now, I don't know what you can do about them. Deportation is not as easy as you think, it takes years, if it can be done at all, you can't deport if a country won't accept them. But I do know while our elected officials are willy-dickin' around tryign to figure out how to solve the crisis of the ones who are already here, they are missing out on the bigger picture which is how to prevent this problem in the future!
Sunday, March 26, 2006
Speaking of AC filters, I have never seen anything like what we pulled out of the wall today. No wonder the girl who is moving out had extremely high electric bills. THE FILTER WAS NEVER CHANGED! This filter was so nasty, you could see no light through it. It was jam packed with dust, dirt and hair, lik eyou wouldn't believe. Everyone knows you keep a better running and more efficient unit and lower cooling and heating bills if you have a clean filter. I can't believe she never changed it. Anyway DH changed the filters.
So let's see what have we done in two days?
Vacuumed and deodorized the carpets throughout the house.
Scrubbed the toilet, two sinks, shower, gardeb tub, and floor in the master bath.
Scrubbed the sink and toilet in the guest bath.
Cleaned out the kitchen cabinets.
Swept the front and back decks.
Cleaned the windows.
Set up our bookcases and books, pictures, and knick knacks.
Put away dishes, glasses, and assorted kitchen things.
Hung up a wide assortment of clothes in the closet
Stored a bunch of stuff in our other two walk-in closets (OMG I LOVE walk in closets, we have so much space!!)
I still need to clean the outside of all the windows, the outside of the doors, scrub the guest bathroom shower and tub, clean the blinds, run the dishwasher and clean it, and clean out the rest of the kitchen cabinets. And oh yeah I need to do that master shower one more time. I have to have a clean bathroom (and kitchen) otherwise I can't function :)
And that fridge, that damned fridge. It's a double-door fridge with one side freezer, one side fridge. Well, she, the tenant that is, had the power turned off and forgot something had been in the fridge and it well you know--stunk up the fridge. The smell is almost gone but not quite. DH and I put two boxes of baking soda in there and left the doors open to air out. Today we found the ice cube tray still had water in it, no wonder the thing smelled. Maybe now that smell will go away.
I don't know what that irritating odor was in the house I think a cat must have pissed in the house somewhere, maybe on the welcome mat inside the door, which I threw out today. The place smelled better once I got rid of it. DH worked hard vacuuming and deodorizing that carpet the other night and it really made it smell nice. The carpet is really nice, very green and very plush and we want to take good care of it.
You wouldn't believe how nice the place looks, especially with our stuff in there, we plan to take good care of the place, I think the guy who owns it will be really happy. We've been in touch and he is looking forward to having folks like DH and me living in his place and making it our home. When he comes up here on Friday to survey the place he won't be seeing what SHE left, he'll be seeing how good we have the place and he will keep that in his mind and when we move out, you can guarantee we'll leave it better than when we found it. He is also going to take care of some things around there, like fixing a window, a broken drawer in the master bath, some other odds and ends that come with regular wear and then he'll power wash the vinyl siding of the house, which needs to be done but will look like new when done. He's also going to pick up some trash and things that happen to be laying around that she might leave or that might have been there when she moved in last August. He told me he was adamant about her cleaning that place up. The outoors is just gorgeous, but they burned some things in a pile in the backyard that needs to be picked up. Also there's some metal and odds and ends thrown about one part of the yard and really DH and I don't want to be tasked with cleaning it all up. I don't believe we'd have to, thogh our new LL, Patrick says he will take care of things for us.
All he wants is to have people living in his home who will take care of it, and in return all we want is a LL who is nice, cares about taking care of his place, leaves us alone, and will fix things when they need fixing.
I will say this. No matter how much we make this home, this is it for us as far as renting. I just dont' want to live in someone else's house anymore. Next place will be OURS, well some of it will be the banks but hopefully we'll pay it off quickly.
The bright side of all the shit we've been doing lately? There's this dog that lives with a family down the street from us. The girl who is moving out of our place told us about him, says he comes over and hants out, and is really cute and playful. Well they are right. He's probably 7 years old, and he's a yellow lab, well-fed, adorable and very friendly. He just comes right over and hangs out and watches us, likes to be petted, and then lays down in the sun. He's harmless, so we don't mind. He looks very well cared for. He's got a collar too with a name and phone number on it and he's got his rabies vaccination tag on it. He seems to be very well taken care of. If I had a dog, he would not be running around even if it were to the neighbor's house. But since he's well fed and cared for and is a good dog, I won't complain.
We decided to take Chicago Peepers Kitty Kat to be adopted. We will contact Animal Services, get her in the kitty karrier and take her down there this week. In three days after that, we will contact the Humane Society and give them the info and they will pick up kitty and take her to the shelter which is by the way, a no-kill shelter (yes, I checked first!).Then they will be able to adopt her out. We have a bed for her, a scratching post, a bag of food and some toys we will take to them. This is the best we can do. We don't believe in having an outdoor cat, and I can't keep her indoor for two reasons--one, I am allergic to cat dander and two, it's not in our lease. Hell even if it were in the lease, I couldn't take the dander in the house! So that's the end of it, I'd love to find her a home myself and decide who gets her but we don't have that luxury. When I look at her I think "will she miss us?" and I hope that she doesn't think we're just throwing her away. I think that God sent this stray kitty to us for us to take care of her before she was placed in a real home, with people who can have her indoors and not have allergies or worry about landlords who don't want indoor cats. We had her spayed, we had her rabies and distemper shots and leukemia vaccination done and she's real clean, we think that she will get adopted right away. I hope so, she's a good cat. And I hope she gets to keep the name "Peepers" that we gave her because it's so fitting. I hope she doesn't miss the forest here and the large overgrown azalea bushes she likes to sleep under, and the raccoons she likes to chase off at night.
I just hope she finds a good home with kind and caring people who will take good care of her and be good to her.
Five days and we're outta here for good. Maybe I haven't thought much of it lately because we've been so busy but it's starting to hit me. I've posted the photos of this place, you've seen it, it's small but it's cozy and since it's spring, the forest is green now and it's a nice comfortable temperature outside, perfect for a cookout, or taking a good book outside and reading it. I can't do any of that though because I have to work on a research paper.
Don't even get me started about this paper. I did an outline, I need more structure and narrowing of my topic, and I need time to sit and do research and write uninterrupted. Maybe next weekend when we are moved into our new place I can do it. But right now it's hard to sit down and focus. I have to get an "A" in this class. I have to, if there's any class I'm good in it's this kind of class, writing and research and critical thinking are my thing. My professor is a wonderful mentor but she can't write it for me, I have to do it. I know she has faith in me, more than I have in myself at times, and she knows I can do this. She's known me fourteen years, so if anyone knows my abilities in regards to coursework, she does. Without her I never would have come this far in my critical thinking so I thank her profusely for sticking with me and watching me go from a young twenty-something, idealistic, opinionated, and unfocused, foolish young Democrat to a thirtysomething, wise, still opinionate, mature, logical and independent minded person.
But you know what? Right now there's a great movie on that i really need to watch, called "The Straight Story" starting Richard Farnsworth. I love this man and this is a great film, that really renews your faith in people. Not all people in this world are bad, and we come across people who change our lives for the better, more often than we realize.
Alvin's 200 miles into his journey and a woman he meets up with asks him if he's scared of traveling alone or the people he might run into.
I love his reply:
"I fought the trenches in WWII why should I be scared of an Iowa cornfield"
Classic! This movie puts a big smile on my face!
Saturday, March 25, 2006
DH and I spent a few hours cleaning the new place yesterday afternoon. Yeah we could wait for the current tenant to do it, but really we needed to get out stuff in and didn't mind. I cleaned the kitchen and bathrooms and he vacuumed the carpets. The place really looks great. Whereas before we had apprehensions about moving in, we are looking forward to it now. I hope she will be willing to part with her two couches she left there. They are beautiful soft and comfortable couches and I'd like to have them. And they go really well with the decor. I left her a phone message letting her know that when she comes down from Jax she doesn't have to take them back with her (hint hint!). Hey if she takes them, she takes them. We still have our futon.
I am so tired, I've been cleaning and I am tired and not looking forward to moving yet more stuff tomorrow.
All I have to say is this is IT. This is our second rental place since we got married and this is the last one. Nex time we move it's for good. It is SUCH a pain in the ass!
Friday, March 24, 2006
These are some of the many toys we had! Just click to get a good view!
Holly Hobbie Sewing Machine
Schwinn Ten Speed
Easy Bake Oven
Etch a Sketch
Evel Knievel doll
Hot Wheels racetracks
Malibu Ken (and Barbie)
Barbie's pink corvette
Thursday, March 23, 2006
Your Linguistic Profile:
50% General American English
0% Upper Midwestern
Apparently in Texas they've exhausted their search for bad guys and are now arresting people in bars for being drunk! Undercover agents in Texas have gone into numerous bars and arrested people for being intoxicated. The spokesmoron for the Texas Alcohol Beverage Commission says "Being in a bar does not exempt one from the state laws against public drunkenness".
According to the Houston Chronicle:
People arrested for public intoxication "are not people who had a couple of beers with dinner. They are people who are so drunk that they caught the attention of a TABC agent," Beck said. TABC agents have the discretion to cite the person for public intoxication and release them to "a responsible party." Or, a person who is so drunk "that they may be a danger to themselves or others" can be arrested and taken to jail, Beck said.
Part of the problem with enforcing the state's code regulating alcohol sales is "people still think that a bar is place to go get drunk," Beck said. "People can go into bars and have fun with their friends and not become intoxicated to the point whether they may become a danger to themselves or others."
I suppose this will go to the Supreme Court so that like the convenient reinterpretation of "public use" in eminent domain abuse cases, we can find out what exactly "public drunkenness" really means, with an emphasis of course on "public".
Texas Penal Code states:
§ 49.02. PUBLIC INTOXICATION.(a) A person commits an offense if the person appears in a public place while intoxicated to the degree that the person may endanger the person or another. (b) It is a defense to prosecution under this section that the alcohol or other substance was administered for therapeutic purposes and as a part of the person's professional medical treatment by a licensed physician. (c) Except as provided by Subsection (e), an offense under this section is a Class C misdemeanor. (d) An offense under this section is not a lesser included offense under Section 49.04. (e) An offense under this section committed by a person younger than 21 years of age is punishable in the same manner as if the minor committed an offense to which Section 106.071, Alcoholic Beverage Code, applies.Added by Acts 1993, 73rd Leg., ch. 900, § 1.01, eff. Sept. 1, 1994. Amended by Acts 1997, 75th Leg., ch. 1013, § 12, eff. Sept. 1, 1997.
The fourth amendment of the U.S. Constitution states:
The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.
There is however something courts have generally upheld which is known as "stop and frisk" which means police can take someone into custody with probable cause and without a warrant if they believe the person has committed a felony or misdemeanor in their presence. The thing is that the probable cause must be met under conditions which exist prior to being detained because whatever is found afterwards is not sufficient to establish a pre-existing probable cause.
So, in the cases in Texas, say the undercover agents go into a bar, and observe a few patrons having a few beers and laughing loudly, but not causing any trouble. Thinking that laughing loudly may indicate intoxication, the agents detain the patrons and take them into custody. Remember that Texas law states public intoxication is when "the person appears in a public place while intoxicated to the degree that the person may endanger the person or another."
So basically according to "Stop and Frisk" they at least have reasonable cause to detain these patrons. Right? All they need is a blood alcohol test that shows the blood alcohol level is above the legal limit which I believe is .08. If it is, then the patrons were violating the law.
The question I would have is, if the patrons weren't doing anything wrong and committing no crime, how could there be probable cause? Surely the blood alcohol test isn't probable cause because it was done after the agents detained them.
Any lawyers want to comment? Hey I could be wrong but this is the way I am interpreting it.
In any case I don't think probable cause matters here. It's simple, if you're in Texas and you're drinking excessively in a bar, and if you appear to be intoxicated to a degree where you may endanger yourself or someone else, you can be arrested. This seems very subject to interpretation.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not a fan of drunks wreaking havoc on society but it does appear to me that it's unconstitutional to arrest someone for a crime not yet committed. To me, that is definitely a violation of the fourth amendment. If I were a practicing attorney I'd be jumping at the bit to take that case.
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
I bring this up because of a comment made by an anonymous person to the post I made venting about DH and me needing to find common ground.
This comment "Before he puts his hands on you your world will be so small there won't be anywhere to turn." really got to me because one it implies my DH would hit me and two, it implies he is trying to make my world smaller. Actually he wouldn't hit me and my world isn't small because of DH, it's small because of me. He encourages me to go out and do things with friends and get out of the house and have fun. But I choose to stay home where I'm comfortable and I choose to have just a few close friends I can count on one hand because I find that friendship is an important thing that takes a lot of time and I don't take it lightly. It's hard for me to keep up with people as it is so I prefer a small world with just a few people I care a lot about.
Last night in class we were discussing the topics of our research papers and one girl who is a psych major discussed the issue of marriage counseling for multicultural couples. She talked about how a couple from very different cultural backgrounds would go see a counselor who would try to mold them into your "average middle class white family" (borrowing a phrase from my teacher of course). I began to think about DH and me and how we get along 90 percent of the time and argue the other 10 percent. I began to think about how different our backgrounds are. He's from up north, from a different upbringing and a different family structure while I am from Florida, and my family structure is different from his. Our experiences in life also make us different.
And so we come into this marriage with a different way of looking at things. Hell we are very different and were raised very differently. We were both raised with morals and values but as to our heritage and the environment we were raised in, it was different. DH is Pennsylvania Dutch, Lutheran, with a cultural background of English, German, and Irish. I on the other hand am a native Floridian, with a mother raised Jewish and a father raised Christian, and we three kids had no real religious upbringing, we were raised to have morals but not a specific religion. And our background is Italian, Sicilian, Irish, German, Cherokee, Romanian and English.
Geez, with that makeup how could DH and I NOT argue? LOL!
On most things we can agree black is black and white is white but on some issues we can't agree at all. I'd say we agree on all the hot button issues like politics, finances, child-rearing, family values, things like that. Where we don't agree comes down to much smaller issues, well I think they are small but to him they are important. For instance, he believes that if he's in a disagreement with someone else, I should take his side, no matter what, it's a show of solidarity, loyalty, which to a point I agree with. If he's in a disagreement with someone I would not come out and tell him "you're wrong" in front of that other person I don't believe in that. But in private I'd tell him I disagreed. He sometimes takes that to think that I am against him but I always tell him "I am always on your side but we won't always agree". I mean in good conscience when we're alone I can't say "I agree with you" if I know that he's wrong. I wouldn't expect him to do that either. We usually don't argue over that though, we usually talk about it and laugh it off.
The only time it seems that we argue is in some times of crisis. Is that strange or what? It's when we both know we need each other's support the most, but sometimes that isn't the case. I'm not good in crisis, because I don't like chaos, I need order. On the other hand, while he hates chaos too, he's a former EMT and volunteer firefighter, he knows a lot about planning, preparation and survivalism and he really knows how to take charge of things. And in those times he might say "let's do this" and I might argue the case. Well hello. I know I am not good in emergencies so WHY do I argue with him when he tries to take charge? LOL.
There are other times we argue for no reason other than we're both stressed because of a situation. For instance when our LL told us he was selling this place that we disagreed on some things in regards to moving and we were so stressed out from the anger we felt from having to move, that we took it out on one another. We weren't mad at each other, we were just stressed about the whole situation. So finally we took a breather and realized we have to stick together in crisis. It's awfully lonely to go through crisis fighting with the person you love. You need that support and so since we promised to do that, things have been much easier. There are times I want him to make decisions because it's easier on me not to have to do it and there are times when he wants me to make decisions because he doesn't want to be bothered. I am a detail person, he's an "overall" person. In other words, if I ask him "what do you want for dinner: lasagna or meatloaf" he's like "I don't care, whatever you want" and then I push the issue and he gets annoyed. Then there's times when he asks me something and I'm like "I don't care" because really I'm not interestd. Drives him crazy at times, me too.
My best friend Deb tells me that there's something called a "power struggle" going on in our marriage. I think that is right on the mark and we aren't the first persons I know of to go through it. When I mentioned it to DH he agreed. Both of us, after nearly five years of marriage, are trying to establish our territory, and how far we can go with one another, and what our boundaries are.
The thing with DH and me is really we don't need to be struggling for power because for most of the time we are pretty easygoing and not at all demanding. For all his faults, DH is a kind, hardworking, generous person. They say women marry men who are like their fathers. I think this is true. My own father is hardworking, honest, generous and kind and always giving to his family. He'd be the first to tell you that he wasn't always the easiest to get along with. In his younger days, when he was about my DH's age, dad was loud and boisterous, opinionated and his word was law. There were times he would yell and get angry. He worked a lot, and I think the stress of work really got to him at times. But on the flip side he was FUN and we had a great time with him! And then mom, who was more passive than aggressive and more a placater and very easygoing, knew how to use her traits to her advantage. She knew how to calm dad down in a crisis, she knew how to handle him most times. They loved doing nice things for one another and we enjoyed how happy it made them. Mom would do things like cooking dad's favorite meal every New Year's Day and dad would do things like one Christmas, he got this huge box and bought mom a ton of earrings and perfume and packed the little boxes inside the big box and when she opened it, she thought it was just one thing but he told her to keep going and it turned out she had all these bottles of perfume and jewelry hidden among newspaper in the box. One bottle of perfume would have made her happy but he wanted to do something different, something he knew would to make her laugh and that she'd always remember. And yes she does still remember, all of us do.
Mom and dad had their moments, I remember them arguing a lot, but they've been married forty years, raised three kids and believe me they have been through so many serious crises in their lives. Given all they've been through, they weathered the storms pretty good I'd say. And so I believe DH and I will weather the storms too. It's because we went into this marriage without expectations that marriage was some kind of Cinderella fantasy. The fact is that our expectations were more normal. We expected to argue and fight, to disagree, and to be annoying to each other and annoyed by each other at times. We expected it wouldn't be easy.
I can't tell you how many times DH has done things for me just because it made him happy to see me smile. I can't tell you how many times he's surprised me with stuffed animals. We have nearly 40 in our house because he likes surprising me. He makes me things for my kitchen to help me get better organized. He send mes cute emails, he makes me laugh, we have fun when we go out to eat at our favorite restaurant and just hang out. Some people might think "oh well this doesn't make up for the times he acts like a jerk" but you know what? Yes it does.
The way I see it, every person has at least two sides. I have always been the kind of person who believes there is good in most people. DH has so much good in him, I wouldn't have married him if he didn't. Yes he's pissed me off and done things that annoy me, but in all honesty I have done the same to him. We have said hurtful things we always apologized for becuase one thing we're adamant about is trying not to make the other person feel inferior. That's just wrong. We don't call each other names either. We just don't like being hurtful in that way.
Sometimes we are both so damn stuck in what we believe is right, that we refuse to bend. What we're trying to work towards is better communication and meeting in the middle on everything, this means we both have to give a little. Recently DH and I had a talk about my parents, and I told him that while I see his point in why he's so upset that they think he's wrong in defending himself when someone in the family says something to him (and yes, I do see his point), I told him it would make me happy to have my family over to our house. I told him how much it meant to me and that it was something that was very important to me. Oh sure, I could go to their house anytime I want to, but I want them to come to our house too.
In discussing this, we didn't argue, we didn't fight. And after we joked about a few things, he agreed with me. Now he might have issues with them at this time, but he's not going to make it such an issue that they can't come to our house. When they come over he will go somewhere helse. But he compromised and for us that was a big deal. It's such a tremendous step in our relationship. My best friend told me that if I listened to him and really tried to understand his feelings on the matter, (without giving my opinion which I have a bad habit of doing) that eventually he would listen to me and see my side. What I learned is I need to listen more and give less opinions of what I think, and he needs to do the same. A person is more willing to listen to you and try to understand where you're coming from even if they don't agree with you, if you just do the same for them. And so we did that. And I can't tell you what a major breakthrough that was for us. We both gave a little towards the middle and both of us got what we wanted.
And that my friend is how one step at a time, we will make it.
My parents, grandparents and my experiences in life have helped mold my view of what marriage is supposed to be like and the same goes for DH. We have both told people that marriage is WORK and anyone that says it isn't just isn't doing it right. You can't expect to throw two people with different personalities, different experiences and from different backgrounds together for life and expect them to live in harmony every single day of their lives. We've only been married five years, but we have come a long way, and we still have a lot to learn. Any couple married for a long time will tell you that marriage is really a lifelong learning experience. Never think you have the other person all figured out because you don't!
DH and I both have our faults and our flaws and we argue and fight at times, but one thing both agree on always, without a doubt, is that we're committed to making this work and that it will work.
Many people don't even have that. :)
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
Now some of you may not be South Park fans and frankly I wasn't before I married DH but OMG for five years I have laughed my ass off. No, it doesn't make me offensive, I just like non-PC humor and South Park is what I like to call "an equal opportunity offender". as no person or current event is left un-mocked!
South Park is pure satire. It makes fun of nearly every aspect of our culture and picks at current events and the people (usually celebrities, government officials and big businessmen) making the headlines.
Yes it's insane but so are we!
Monday, March 20, 2006
I just have strange dreams...naturally!
I remember being in prison and I was there for having been convicted for what I thought was murder. But as it turns out, it was for assault and battery of my lawyer, who ironically was "Alexis Davis" from General Hospital. I had NO memory of the incident. I couldn't remember ANYTHING I was accused of doing yet everyone including my family thought I was guilty. I somehow got to see my grandmother at her house in the dream and even she thought I did it. I kept crying and saying "I didn't do it" and I remember the worst part was feeling helpless because I couldn't remember doing it. Someone asked me "what's the last thing you remember?" and I couldn't recall any recent memory. I recalled that I had memory of months before but the events were unclear. I just know I didn't do it.
I told the officials they could take my fingerprint and match it. Well I willingly put my print on something I had and gave it to them, and I was given back my file with the fingerprint reports from the crime and they matched.
I said "ok fine when did it happen?" and somehow I thought they said April or August 2006 and I said "ha I wasn't even living here" but then I saw my arrest and conviction report and it said the crime was committed on December 26, 2006.
In real life that is my sister's 36th birthday.
I was so scared in the dream. Imagine people telling you that you committed a crime but you have NO memory of it! I had NO memory of it and unlike other dreams where I have been able to tell myself it was a dream, I did not know this was a dream so I could not wake up. And when I did wake up I was still in some kind of shock over the dream itself.
Is this a warning? Am I going to do something bad on December 26,2006? And worse--am I not going to remember it?
Sunday, March 19, 2006
When we went inside today, the smell wasn't as bad in the kitchen, it's slowly going away but trust me it needs help. We are going to have to really clean that kitchen out. It's not filthy or anything but some bleach and renuzits and baking soda will clear out the odors. Also in one of the bedrooms it smells like animals. I bet she had her cat in there. That whole place needs airing out!
Also, we noticed a pile of mail on the counter that had been there yesterday. I glanced at it and this is amazing---there is mail there from September 2005 that is NOT for her but for the former tenant and the owner! There are checks there!! I can't friggin believe she never forwarded that stuff to them or even made a note to the postmaster so they could pick it up and return it! If someone held on to my mail like that I'd be pissed!! I can't imagine anyone but her put that mail there, to my knowledge the owner hasn't been here and I certainly think if he had been, he wouldn't have left the windows open. We know nobody had been there since the time we got there Saturday morning.
I'm amazed at people ya know? First off, DH and I are clean people and not only will we clean the hell out of that place when we move in but it will be shining when we move out in fourteen months. Also, we would never damage the place intentionally and if we did accidentally damage something we would tell the owner right away!! And if we ever got someone else's mail we would return it to the postman immediately! I can't imagine the kind of person who just doesn't give a damn like that ya know?
.....Editing in 3/21:
Ok, all is well and we're moving in as scheduled April 1st!!
More to come!
Saturday, March 18, 2006
The sad news is we can't keep her. We just can't justify the increase in rent each month that would be required and we're concerned about any damage she might do if we let her in the house. And as mom can attest to this fact, I was raised to keep these kind of pets in the house, especially at night. I am allergic to too much cat dander too so I can't have a cat in the house all the time.
So, in a week or so we'll load up all her goodies, take her to animal services. They will hold her for three days, then we will call the Humane Society and they will pick her up and adopt her out. She's two years old, healthy, playful and we have a record here of the spay, distemper and rabies shot and leukemia vaccine we got her recently. She should be very adoptable! We hate doing this, she's like a part of our family, but what else can we do? We have to do what's best for us and for her.
DH and I signed the lease and gave our $1,000 deposit today. Then we took our trailer full of stuff and went to the new place to store them. Remember that we can't move in till April 1st but the tenant has no problem with us storing some of our stuff there, she even sent us a key.
We got there and immediately noticed that someone had attempted to pry the door open in the area where the deadbolt is. We don't know if the tenant did it or if someone tried to break in to the place. All the windows were open, and when we tried to close them, one wouldn't close all the way because of a crack in the window and a problem in the metal that holds it in place. We also noticed a broken drawer in the one of the Master bath cabinets.
The place definitely needs to be cleaned but she cut off her utilities before she moved to Jacksonville so how is she going to clean? The toilets need cleaning, the floor needs mopping, the carpets need vacuuming. Now she's not done moving her stuff out so we'll give her time but I hope she cleans it up.
DH was so adamant about an April 1st move in date that we told the realtor that if she didn't finish it we would. But in looking at this slight physical damage, we feel that not only is our security at risk with this door being like this and the window not closing and locking properly, but we dont' want to eventually be held liable for damage we did not do.
So we brought all our stuff back home today and unloaded it. I called the realtor's office and spoke with the girl who has been helping us all this time. She is going to talk to the head property manager on Monday and find out what to do. It has to get fixed, the question is does it get fixed before this girl's lease is up or do we need to delay the move-in? I'm telling you when they asked us to delay our move-in to April 7th we should have taken them up on it. But no, we wanted to move in on the 1st. We could have let them go in and clean and do maintenance and all that shit but no we had to rush it.
At this point in time, if it doesn't get done and if they refuse (which we doubt..the owner seems to be a decent guy and why would he want his property to remain damaged?) we will ask for our deposit back. But our guess is that it gets fixed. Either a metal plate can be installed over the areas of the deadbolt and the regular lock on the knob or the door can be replaced. There's nothing wrong with the door so I think a metal plate would suffice. It would prevent anyone from being able to jimmy the door. And as for the window, well it may have to be replaced. And it can come out of her deposit if it wasn't like that when she moved in. But either way, we would not feel safe in a place where we could not be secure. We are sure they will take care of things. The question now is when?
We feel it would all workout but if she doesn't finish cleaning once her stuff is moved out we're going to be busy. Next time we just let them do their thing. There's actually NO next time, this is our second and last rental place ever!
And that's the story.
Friday, March 17, 2006
These days you could never get away with what producers got away with in the old days. Other than South Park, there's not a show on television that rivals these two in offensive content.
You gotta love it.
The 1990's didn't introduce the dysfunctional family, that began some twenty years before. American television comedy went from the perfect nuclear family programs like Leave it to Beaver, Dick Van Dyke Show, Father Knows Best and the Brady Bunch to well---Archie and Meathead, George and Weezie, Maude and Walter. These programs were based on reality. Ignorant bigoted Christian blue collar white man who never really made much of his life meets equally obnoxious and racist black man from the projects who hit it big and became rich meets the loudmouthed, opinionated radical liberal feminist.
Life wouldn't have been the same without hearing the words "Meathead" or "God's gonna get you for that Walter" and "Honkey!"
Remember these sound clips?
God'll get you for this!
and of course this great one by Louise:
Louise: Lionel, you'd better go to your room. I don't want you to get hit by your father.
Lionel: Why would Dad hit me?
Louise: Because I'm not sure just where I'm going to throw him!
It wasn't just the words they said it was how they said them. Anyone who remembers these show remembers Archie's ignorance and inability to pronounce simple words, George's blatant obnoxiousness, and Maude's defiant feminist attitude.
Thursday, March 16, 2006
Florida Senate Bill 28:
"An act relating to public K-12 educational instruction;amending s.1003.42, F.S.; revising provisions relating to required instruction and courses of study in the public schools; including study of the history of the United States and free enterprise; requiring standards and asessments adopted by the State Board of Education to conform; providing requirements for the teaching and assessment of the history of the United States;amending s.12 1003.43, F.S., relating to general requirements for high school graduation; including study of the Declaration of Independence; amending s.15 1002.20, F.S.;conforming a cross-reference; providing an effective date."
At first I thought hey it's about time they set down some ground rules and mandate that schools teach our Constitution, especially the Bill of Rights and teach the Declaration of Independence and the Federalist papers, natural sovereignty, limited government, free enterprise, civil government, relationships between federal, state and local governments, and the history of this country from discovery to present minus the revisionist and postmodernist theories. This is a great basis for becoming a responsible citizen!
But I thought kids were already supposed to be learning these things in civics, american history and world history classes in public schools. Well when I was in school yeah, but not now. I have no idea what kids are learning now but it's not this stuff, maybe at the AP and IB levels but not at the average levels. I think kids need to learn about the government that strips their parents paychecks of taxes, and the country whose president or other elected representatives they may very well be choosing the year after they graduate from high school.
The bill also includes a caveat about teaching the history of women, african-americans and hispanics and their contributions to this country.
No I don't have a problem with the that, it's the fact that the schools have to be mandated to do it and that it's listed separately from "American History" in this bill. I believe that American History encompasses ALL American History including that of women, hispanics, and blacks (I'm sorry I don't believe in the term African-American because they are not African).
Aside from that there are things in this bill that made me say "what?"
For instance the pc-oriented "character development" program that is supposed to begin in Kindergarten and extend to 12th grade. This program mandates that children be taught patriotism, responsibility, citizenship, the Golden Rule, kindness, respect for authority, respect for life, liberty and personal property, honesty, abstinence until marriage, charity, self-control, racial, ethnic and religious tolerance, and cooperation.
Holy Cow! Stop the presses!!
Every single thing on this list was taught by parents when I was in school. Even my grandparents would admit that these are things that were first learned at home. If I had kids I would be upset to learn that the school might be teaching values different from my own. For instance, schools around the US right now are teaching --no-- forcing Muslim culture on students but yet the children are not allowed to learn Jewish, Christian or other cultures. It's all out of respect and tolerance of course.
Of course I'll give some credit that the bill allows students to be exempted from reproductive health courses through written parental permission, it's absurd that it is being taught in schools in the first place.
The bottom line is that the reason these values are being taught in school is because they're not being taught at home. What scares me is when the children of this country get a government funded "indoctrination" and the time when all of their core values will be covered in the schools. The schools are teaching these children what they feel is acceptable. It may not at all be in line with what parents would do!
I wonder if it'll pass. I hate to say it but I'm on the fence. Something tells me I should not back this one.
I've always like Isaac Hayes, I think he's just cool. And his character "Chef" on South Park has cracked me up since I began watching a few years ago. He's endured a show full of insults of Jews, Christians, homosexuals, transgenders, the disabled, atheists, and God knows how many other groups of people.
For the most part, the show is an equal opportunity offender, no group (and I mean NO group!) goes un-mocked.
But only now he decides to quit the show after a an episode a few months ago which was aimed at mocking the Church of Scientology. The episode featured San being being hailed as a "reluctant savior" by Scientology leaders while Tom Cruise locks himself in a closet and refuses to come out. The episode was hilarious. Well to everyone but Isaac Hayes.
"There is a place in this world for satire, but there is a time when satire ends and intolerance and bigotry towards religious beliefs of others begins."
"Religious beliefs are sacred to people, and at all times should be respected and honored. As a civil rights activist of the past 40 years, I cannot support a show that disrespects those beliefs and practices." .....Isaac Hayes
Thanks to civil rights he has the opportunity to be on that program and be paid quite nicely for his efforts. And for almost nine years he's been supporting a show that does an awful lot of disrespecting in the name of humor. It's called COMEDY Isaac and the reason so much of this mocking is hysterical is because it's so damn close to the real thing. South Park likes to mock radical people and groups (hell even Saddam was a target!) and let's face it, radicals are so ridiculous they make easy targets.
I'm going to miss Chef but I am looking forward to the episode which you know is coming. The one targeting Isaac Hayes for his hypocrisy. I'll be tuned in for sure, I know it's going to be hysterical!
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
Someone had a birthday yesterday. Yep it was pa. He turned sixty and I am still trying to wrap my mind around that one because I just don't see it. Oh I see he's gotten older but to we three kids our parents will always be in their thirties, which were really good years for them.
Dad used to joke around and say he wouldn't make it past forty but he did. He made it through his childhood, wild teenage years, 40 years of marriage, three kids, finances, countless pets, health problems, and working his fingers to the bone.
I don't ever recall a time when dad put himself over mom and us kids.
When his only brother died years ago, he remained strong for his family, and when my mother's beloved father, our "gramps" had to make the final trip to the hospital before he died, it was dad who drove him.
When our great grandmother, a tough old Sicilian we called "Nonna" was sick and wouldn't eat, it was only dad who could get through to her.
When our beloved family pets died one by one over the years, it was dad who took on the task of burying them and it was dad who usually took us all back to the pound to get another one.
When we moved up here from Miami 25 years ago and dad couldn't get a transfer with Southern Bell right away, he lived on his own, sometimes in a camper perched on the back of his 1974 Ford pickup and worked away from home, visiting us on the weekends, sometimes less.
It was dad who protected my sister from a malicious asshole police chief whose only reason for pulling my sister over and taking her in was because he didn't like my parents.
When work needed to be done on the house, when pipes froze, when the driveway had to be redone, when cars needed to be fixed, when someone needed to get on the roof, dad was the one who did it.
When people made cracks about Jews and offended my mother's heritage it was dad who stood up to them.
When the union went on strike, dad never crossed a picket line.
It was dad who first put a .44 magnum and .357 in our hands and taught us how to shoot when we were kids.
When it was time to learn how to drive, it was dad who took us around our property time and time again in his cherished silver Lincoln while we tried to keep it on the road.
I recall the time he wanted to move a shed about 100 feet and when the vehicle pulling the shed got stuck, he attached another vehicle to the first one, when both vehicles were stuck with the trailer, he had to use a third one to pull them all out. Finally he had to get a neighbor's tractor to pull out the three stuck vehicles and the shed. That is a story we all will never forget!
Dad knows how to wheel and deal, I have never seen anyone make deals and get what he wanted like dad can.
And oh yes, he tells the BEST stories!
Dad often liked to work overtime because the money was excellent. And there were many Saturdays when we were home with mom and dad would say "go ahead take the kids out" even though going without him wasn't the same, it made him feel good that his wife and kids could go out and have a good time.
I recall how excited dad was when he was getting a really big tax refund and decided to build himself a workshop. He'd always had sheds to work in but never a really big workshop with plenty of space. For years after he built it, he spent countless hours in it. Most Saturdays and Sundays he'd be out there at the crack of dawn and you'd have to yell a dozen times to get him to come in for three meals. That's the only time you really saw him that day. He loved being out there, piddling on a car or something else. I remember he won this huge Magnavox television in a raffle and put that and a VCR in the shop and would watch John Wayne, Clint Eastwood, Charles Bronson, and Bruce Willis movies. Yeah even I used to pull my car in there to wax while watching Die Hard II. I guess sometimes the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
Mom and dad are completely different personalities. Dad was always the more aggressive and assertive one (although mom does give him a run for his money these days), and mom was the more calm, compassionate, rational one. When he liked to argue, she liked to placate things and make everything copacetic. And even mom will admit that when times were tough, dad always made us feel like it was all going to be ok. Just his presence made us all feel better. There was this one time when we were kids when a tornado was heading towards where we lived. We all huddled in the hallway with the family pets while dad stood at the front door watching it. Dad stood at the front door watching it pass us by. I never understood how he could remain so calm in the face of fear but he did. I bet it was because he was thinking about our well-being and not his own. He's like that. A tornado hit our house one day when mom was home alone and it ripped part of the roof. For a few years, mom was terrified of storms and she was addicted to watching the weather. She would get upset at the slightest hint of thunder. She never felt completely safe unless dad was there with her. He had that ability to make you feel safe in times of crisis.
Dad has always been there for us, always working hard, not necessarily for himself but for mom and us. People know dad as the kind of man who keeps his word, who is trustworthy, dependable, and hardworking.
When we were kids dad had a temper, he was young and aggressive. He wasn't by any means perfect, he'd be the first to admit that. But as he aged, he mellowed, relaxed and became calmer. But he has never lost his ability to set things straight and make people understand where he's coming from. Nobody can pull the wool over his eyes, nobody can play him for a fool, nobody can one-up him.
I want dad to be around forever. Yeah I know he won't be but for just a moment it's nice to have that dream. As I watch him age and slow down somewhat, I recall the days when you could not slow him down, when he refused to give up and would not stop. In many ways he is still like that. He hasn't given up even when the odds were against him. Unlike mom who finds it easy to share her feelings, it's not always easy to know what's on his mind. We've learned that dad handles things in a way that is very personal to him and we respect that. We know he loves us even with all the shit we've ever done in our lives. We know he's there for us.
Life is so short, as he well knows and it can end at any moment. When dad had to have open heart surgery in December 2004, I never felt so lost at the thought that he might not make it. I knew we kids had to be strong for mom and for dad, but at home I just cried. DH was strong and kept telling me dad would be ok, that he's tough and strong and had much to do yet in life. And I knew he was right. And when we said goodbye to him before surgery, all of us family were crowded around him and we were all talking a mile a minute (yep that's normal for us!) and I remember mom asking dad if he wanted some quiet. He said no, it was ok, and he just listened to us all run our mouths! And at that moment I realized perhaps he wanted the noise, wanted to hear us go a mile a minute, that maybe he was listening intently to every word we were saying in case it was the last time he'd ever hear us again. When I thought of that, I got a terrible knot in the pit of my stomach. The strange thing is that in the waiting room, laughing with my siblings and my aunt, grams and mom about all the silly things that had ever gone on in our family, I had a renewed hope and knew dad would make it. He had much left to do.
I was right. And now all I want for him is happiness and good health. I hope he appreciates every day on this earth, and knows that his family loves him very much and our lives would not be the same without him.
I wonder sometimes if dad had big dreams for his life, for he and mom, and for us kids, and what kinds of dreams they were. I know he didn't ever imagine thirty years ago he would be where he is today (we can all relate to that can't we?) but I hope that when he looks back on his life he can see the good things in his life and all the good things he has done for others, and how wonderful a son, husband and dad he really has been and continues to be today. I hope he never ever looks back at any of the mistakes he made and has any regrets because life is so damn short, we just can't dwell on the regrets.
Whenever I hear "I Hope You Dance" by LeeAnn Womack I aways think of my parents, their dreams for themselves, and their dreams for us. I don't know what dreams dad had when he was a kid or in his thirties like me, but I hope that some of them did come true.
Happy Birthday Pa!
I hope you Dance
by LeeAnn Womack
I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat
But always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small
When you stand by the ocean
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens
Promise me you'll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
I hope you dance
I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Living might mean taking chances
But they're worth taking
Lovin' might be a mistake
But it's worth making
Don't let some hell bent heart
Leave you bitter
When you come close to selling out
Give the heavens above
More than just a passing glance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
(Time is a real and constant motion always)
I hope you dance
(Rolling us along)
I hope you dance
(Tell me who)
I hope you dance
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
(Where those years have gone)
I hope you still feel small
When you stand by the ocean
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens
Promise me you'll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
I hope you dance
(Time is a real and constant motion always)
I hope you dance
(Rolling us along)
I hope you dance
(Tell me who)
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
I hope you dance
(Where those years have gone)
(Tell me who)
I hope you dance
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
(Where those years have gone)
Tuesday, March 14, 2006
"There's no way you can protect the United States by building a big cage around it and preventing wild birds from flying in and out."
...U.S. Secretary of Agriculture Michael Johanns
Well fucking duh.....I would never have known that if he hadn't said something. Guess that's why he makes the big money! And just when you didn't think it could get worse, it does:
...Secretary of Health and Human Services Mike Leavitt
"Let me acknowledge that no one in the world is prepared for a pandemic. When you go to the store and buy three cans of tuna fish, buy a fourth and put it under the bed. When you go to the store to buy some milk, pick up a box of powdered milk. Put it under the bed. When you do that for a period of four to six months, you are going to have a couple of weeks of food, and that's what we're talking about."
Sunday, March 12, 2006
Now we spent all day today packing up stuff. I packed up the two large bookcases in the living room, all the breakables and books, the kitchen utensils and kitchenware we don't need and so far we've filled 14 totes full of stuff.
When we moved into this place it was just 500 square feet with four stone walls, cold tile floors, dirty windows in need of dressing, and cobwebs hanging from the rafters.With us it became livable, cozy and a memorable first place to live after we got married.
Saturday, March 11, 2006
Finally the realtor called us at 2:30 and said they hadn't heard from her either so we'd have to take care of it Monday. Meanwhile DH and I decided to go out to a favorite restaurant of ours in that area and on the way home we stopped at the place. Lo and behold there was an SUV out front loaded with stuff. Turns out she had called us while we were out and left a message that she'd be there.
We got to see the place, it's HUGE. What on earth will we do with all that room? Hell we don't even have enough furniture! We need a dining table, chairs, a place for our TVG and stereo equipment, just bookcases and tables, and somethign to sit on. We only have ONE futon, I wanted to put that in the bedroom. Yeah we have some work to do.
The place has three large bedrooms, and three HUGE walk-in closets, two bathrooms, everything is clean for the most part. The master bath has that garden tub, too bad it's stained a bit. The girl who lives there said that when she rented it, nobody had lived in it for awhile and the water was brown and thus stained the tub when first turned on. That sucks, it's a nice tub.
I wont' complain about the huge space because I know that a blog-friend Samantha Alice keeps reminds me "it could be worse" and puts me rightly in my place. Thanks Sam!
Well now all we have to do is give the realtor our $1000 deposit and get our key so we can move stuff in soon. We'll probably have the power turned on soon before we move in so we can clean up the place.
Moving sucks. My back's been giving me trouble, I think it's a pinched nerve and my plantar fasciitis (fallen arches) really hurt if I'm on my feet too much. We are going to have to have help in this, maybe some of my students, friends of ours. In the meantime the girl said that we are welcome to get moving with putting some of our stuff in there so we can be moved out of here by the end of hte month.
Remember that post a few days ago about LL calling me and telling me his girlfriend wants to move in as soon as we're out. She can move in April 1st and we are NOT giving him any more rent. In fact he could be a nice guy and give us the last month's rent we gave him when we moved in almost five years ago. That rent should have been THIS MONTH'S rent which we paid back on March 1st. I'd like that back!
We'll keep you posted!!!
She stayed in the house most of the day. So DH and I went out and got Peepers a scratching post, a litter pan, and a little bed. We'd been waiting all day long for this girl to call us. We wanted to go to dinner then on the way home we wanted to see the place. Well we decided to leave Kitty in the house while we were gone. She was sleeping on the pillow on the futon when we left but when we got home hours later, she was sleeping on our bed on pillows!! Now we can't have that!! I squirted her so she'd get off the bed.
DH and I talked of keeping her because she was getting used to being inside the house, thanks to being in that cage for so long. But the thing is that I noticed she'd also scratched on a piece of wood on the wall in the house, not bad, but I noticed it. I began to worry 1) how will I keep my allergies down if she gets all over the furniture and 2) what if she scratches up the new place?
I am not sure what to do. She's a two year old cat, who I think could be adopted out easily, but what if she's not? Here we have a no-kill shelter and the people at the humane society promised me that she'd never be euthanized if she's healthy. Do we take her to Animal Services and then let the humane society take her? Or do we just rough it?
Just not sure what to do. I don't believe a cat should be left outdoors, and this one liked being inside, yet my allergies act up, even from the cat litter.
She's so sweet, what do I do?
Friday, March 10, 2006
In the meantime, while Peepers is sleeping, we are still waiting for a call from th girl who is renting that place we want to rent out in the country. I can't understand what is so friggin hard about giving us a simple phone call letting us know when we can meet her there and see the place.
Thursday, March 09, 2006
"If we get a wild bird or even a domestic chicken that gets infected with avian flu, we're going to be able to deal with it, because we've got a lot of experience with that," Chertoff said, speaking to newspaper editors and publishers."
Ok now I don't know about you but my first response was "yeah right"
What? Is he kidding? Like they handled things after Katrina? How can he convince us that the government can handle something they haven't experienced in modern times when they can't even handle something we experience several times a year?
Sorry, I'm just not overly confident, not even close!
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Ok second and more importantly, the Pew Hispanic Center reports that as of March 2005, there were about eleven million unauthorized migrants in the US.
Why not call it what it really is?
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
This yahoo Assemblyman Peter Biondi is attempting to push through legislation that would require anyone posting a message on an internet chat or discussion forum to identify themselves with a legal name or address and that any ISP's will be held responsible for defamatory remarks made by persons on those sites.
"Hey Jess, so how are things going? Any progress yet on that place you looked at?"
"Well we're working on it, we have to see the inside Saturday and then the realtor can run our credit applications for the lease. Why do you ask, anything new?" Yes I admit, I secretly hoped he'd say she decided not to take the place.
"Well [insert girlfriend's name here] would like to move in as soon as you guys move out."
"Really?" I ask. Damn! The body isn't even cold yet!
The lease has a clause that we can break it early, with an additional months rent (in addition to the last months' rent we paid when we moved in of course) so he was telling me yesterday that we will have to pay that additional month but we could pay it back however we could, he's cool with payments.
Today I told him that the current tenant's lease is up March 31st and that the owner might need some time to clean it up and that maybe the 15th of April we'd be moved in there. He said we would still pay all of April's rent but he'd prorate it and give us back what we didn't use. So I wonder, if we move out March 31st and his girlfriend is moving in do we really need to pay him that additional month? And oh yeah he's giving us our $100 security deposit back because he didnt' see any damage. Of course not, we take damn good care of that place. He said that he'd only keep the deposit if we left anything there that needed to be hauled off. I'm like "yeah RIIIIIGHT! you don't even clean up your own place and you're worried about us leaving shit behind?"
I mean this guy doesn't throw anything away. Our place is immaculate. How dare he?
Let me tell you something. When we moved in there WE cleaned that friggin cottage. I washed the floors, windows, countertops, stove, cabinets, fridge, DH and I cleaned it all on our own. So LL should be damn lucky we're leaving it in better shape than we found it.
I am angry and I am sad that I will never see my cardinals, blue jays, crows, woodpeckers, robins, tufted titmouses, squirrels, raccoons, foxes, wild turkeys and possums ever again, that I will never sit at our picnic table amidst the trees and hear that soft gentle breeze blowing ever again, and angry that DH and I will never be abel to take long walks down our private drive amidst the tree canopy and pass the three neighbors homes we've become so familiar with.
Today I was thinking about the day that LL offered to sell to us last year for $100,000 for the five wooded acres and $40,000 for the cottage and we turned him down because we felt that was just too damned much. And I am wondering what he is selling it to his girlfriend for. I would be so pissed if he sold it to her for less.
I hate change and I hate that this had to happen so soon. DH and I have lived there since just after we got married almost five years ago. Damnit why is it I am going to miss that place so much? Is it just the wildlife or the lifestyle? This place grew on us, we love it. Even DH admits it, he's going to miss it terribly. It's not just a house to us, it's been our "home" and now it won't be and it's sad.
DH and I like to believe everything happens for a reason. I suppose there's a very good reason behind this. I know we will find happiness in our new rented place but this first one will always have a soft spot in our hearts. Maybe someday our little cottage in the woods will come back to us for keeps. Who knows?
Monday, March 06, 2006
DH and I searched all over and found ONE place. The lease is up April 1st on this one. It's a doublewide 1999 Fleetwood with 2 bedrooms and 2 baths and a large kitchen and living area. It also has a covered deck and front porch. It's on five acres along with a large storage room/workshop and a few other out buildings. Rent's only $625 per month. It has quiet, plenty of trees, a decent rent. THe only thing it's lacking is high speed internet access. It even has a satellite dish. We took a look at the outside the other day and it looks nice, just like new. We peeked inside and it looks so clean, much like the photos we saw on the internet. Fleetwood is top of the line in manufactured homes and this is in a nice rural area.
It's about 20 minutes from here, more towards my parents house in the country, hell it's only about 15 minutes from them. It's an extra 20 minute drive to work though going up our old route, and well with school after hours we'll have to work something out. DH has class at 6:30 pm twice a week and we would get home around 4:15, so he'd be home only an hour before he'd have to leave again. I have class at 7 pm once a week so I have a little longer to relax. My professor has been a good friend to me for a long time so I think she understands I am going through a lot and not quite focusing on my schooling right now, but I will finish this term and I will earn yet another "A" in her class. DH should do fine, he handles stress better than me.
Where do we stand on the app process? Well, we have the app fee ready all we're waiting on is the girl who lives there to come down from Jax where she lives now and show us around. She's not the owner, he lives in Altamonte Springs, which is a few hours south of here. We have to do an official visit at the place before the realtor can run our applications, then pay the security deposit after we're approved. So now we just have to wait on the tenant, I wish we didn't have to wait so damn long. Saturday seems so far away.
So..while we're waiting this week, we'll keep our eyes out for something else in case a better deal comes our way but so far this is it. I and once we're approved we can get them the $1,000 security deposit and we will probably move in April sometime, breaking our lease here but there's a provision in it for that, we just have to pay him a months' extra rent.
I called our landlord who lives next door and we discussed our need to break the lease. Secretly I hoped he'd say his girlfriend doesn't want to buy it but she still does. Wouldn't it be something if they broke up? If we had a security deposit paid on this new place and LL wanted us to stay I'd say "sign a two year binding lease with us and give us 6 months rent free to make up for hte deposit we just lost" and that woudl be the only way we'd stay.
It was a really long day today, I mean really long. I have to go and iron something to wear tomorrow, shower and go to sleep soon.
Thanks for all your good thoughts, I love you all!