..I learned in the military...
1. Never volunteer for anything.
2. Never say "no" to your superior officer.
3. Never date a man you are stationed with, better yet never date a man stationed within a fifty mile radius of your unit.
4. Never tell your Company Commander you can't do pushups because you have cramps.
5. Never participate in practical jokes that involve lifting the "Secret" stamp from the XO's office and stamping everything in sight resulting in the entire crew being threatened with loss of liberty and nightly intensive training until the stamp is returned.
6. Never go underway after you have eaten.
7. Never say "I can do it better than you" if you can't.
8. Never get drunk with a civilians and call your OinC "Yoda" only to find out that his son was a part of that group.
9. Never drink beer followed by screwdrivers.
10. Never believe a recruiter! LOL